Some Good Sound Advice...

Don't feed seagulls.

Why do I say this you ask? Well, let me tell you.

Last Friday after I dropped Lindsey off at preschool, I decided to venture off to do a quick errand at Wal Mart. Zachary's school was running a warm winter clothing drive so I wanted to pick up some inexpensive hats and mittens for children who may not have any this winter. When we arrived, I parked and mindfully schlepped to the back of the van to lug out and assemble the stroller. As I unbuckled Allyson to take her out of the car, she noticed a package of crackers sticking out of the diaper bag. "Cracker?" she politely asked, "Pleeeese?" Of course I had to give her one, afterall, how do you say no to that?

"Sure sweet girl, just let me buckle you up," I replied while sitting her in the seat. As I finished, I noticed a lonely little seagull in the parking spot next to us. Thinking I was really smart, I decided to throw the top couple of crackers (that I thought may be stale) to the hungry looking thing. BIG MISTAKE! I casually tossed the crackers in his direction, then handed Ally hers.

Suddenly, out of nowhere came a big gang of smelly, loud, and aggressive seagulls! Plunging and swooping, the decoy's accomplices came after us! Their wings were huge, their calls deafening! What concerned me the most was that my sweet baby girl was holding a cracker! I instinctively slammed my car door shut so I could high tail it out of there! Just as the door shut, one of them pooped on my head with a SPLAT! Ewwww! Lucky for me (I guess) it was only on my headband. How disgusting! I whipped it off and made a break for the store. While I was in panic mode, Allyson happily munched on her snack while making "tweet tweet" sounds. Go figure?

I was still shaking ( I think I was even talking to myself ...again) when I got to the checkout line at the end of our "quick errand." When we approached the car, that little trouble maker of a seagull was still hanging out in the same spot. "Tweet tweet." chimed Allyson. "Yeah tweet tweet indeed Ally," I responded as I gave that flying rat the evil eye.

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I bet one day you will see me on an episode of When Animals Attack...


"Watch as this clueless mother feeds the savage
flying beasts some crackers, putting her defenseless
child in harms way."


If you do see me on that tv show, try not to laugh too hard as you watch me stumbling and flailing my arms like a blind drunk penguin giving directions okay?

(Does anyone else have that Flock of Seagulls (from the 80's) song stuck in their head? "And I ran I ran so far away?") LOL!