HAPPY NEW YEAR

The New Year is upon us, a time of reflection, celebration and new beginnings. Along with the exhilaration of a fresh start comes the dreaded…New Year’s Resolution. Oh sure I could go with my clever husband’s approach and proclaim, “I resolve to do a little more exercise this year than I did last.” However, I am not convinced that parking one space further from the Dunkin Donuts every day this year is the route that I want to go with. Then again I could rely on the magazine covers at the check out line for inspiration, but doubling my income in thirty days or less seems a bit unrealistic to me. Each year I attempt to improve as a person, yet somehow it doesn’t always come to fruition.

Last year, on top of my own personal resolution, I added an addendum. I decided to “unplug” my kids more often and encourage more outdoor time. As you may recall, last winter was a very snowy one. And although my favorite thing to do on a snowy day is play board games with the kids, the novelty began to wear off on all of us after what seemed like the 80th snow day. On this particular day, boredom and whininess began to set in. Given that whining could potentially send me over the edge, I encouraged the kids to go outside for a while. At our house, gathering the boots, snow pants, mittens and hats takes roughly twenty minutes (if we are lucky), so I vowed to stay strong and not let them back in after ten like they usually do.

It was a picture perfect snow day. After the last zipper was zipped I happily opened the door and pushed…I mean let them out. I then filled the kettle for a nice (quiet) cup of tea. Before the kettle even whistled Lindsey (7) appeared at the door. “It’s cold out here Mum! I am shivering!” I stayed tough and insisted she stay outside longer. Two minutes later Zachary (9) proclaimed, “Mum, I am freezing can I come in?” I shook my head and pointed to the stairs. Then just as I was making my way to the bookcase to grab my book, I innocently glanced out the window. I spied the three of them huddled together in front of the window beckoning me with their sad eyes to please save them! It was as if I’d sent them ice fishing in the Artic! I quickly looked away, but as I attempted to start my book, our littlest one Allyson (3 ) began yowling loudly on the front porch, “Mamma! I am fweezing Mamma! Pweeze let us come in!” So, much to my chagrin, after only seven and a half minutes the gang was back inside.

While helping to unpeel their outdoor clothing, I noticed that indeed they were shivering. To appease my feelings of guilt and shame, I quickly put the kettle back on for hot chocolate. Right before my eyes their sweet little red cheeks turned stark white in a matter of minutes! Normally the whining would have tipped me off but as a result of my quest for quiet I missed the beginning signs of illness. My poor babies all had fevers! I might as well have sent them out in the Artic! Boy did I feel like the worst mother…again.

While the pursuit of more outdoor time didn’t exactly pan out on this day (nor did it last spring when we got a little lost on a hike- but that’s a story for another day) I recognized that mistakes
will inevitably happen, but it’s what you do after you make them that matters. So this year I resolve to learn from my mistakes and simply…listen. I’ll let you know how it goes…hopefully better than my quiet cup of tea!

I Want To Wish You a Merry Christmas!

"Police dah dee dah!"

Last year Allyson would belt out her version of Feliz Navidad almost daily. Now every time I hear this song it makes me smile. Just passing on the smile.

Merry Christmas!

What Would Jesus Do?

I needed to pull into a full service gas station very near to our house for some gas the other day. After I announced what I needed to the man, Lindsey kindly reminded me to watch to make sure that they do not give me too much this time. A few weeks ago, I only had 20.00 with me and somehow the gas machine was broken and didn’t stop. I didn’t notice. (I must have been chatting.) The gas guy frantically stopped the meter at 24.00. He genuinely looked very upset, as if he was going to get into trouble. He explained that the machine was broken; however, I only had 20.00! I told him I would come back and give him the four dollars. And I did.

After telling the story, Ryan quickly responds, “Why would you do that? He made a mistake, not you mum.” I replied, “I just did what I thought Jesus would do.”

Lindsey quickly pipes up from the back seat, “They didn’t have cars back then Mum!”

Really?

This is a first...

"YUCK!" Lindsey exclaims from the bathroom.

Fearing something awful, I hesitate to respond, "Everything okay?" I wince, not really wanting to know.

"Someone put soap on my toothbrush!" I immediately glare over at Zach who lowers his head.

"Zaaach?" I ask.

He pauses then slowly looks up at me. "I did it, I am sorry. She did it to me last night so I did it back."


Please tell me this will pass!

Season Finale

I wrote this post way back in the middle of June...Due to an update on our computer I was unable to post blogs. Better late than never right?


Not unlike most families, this time of year tends to become incredibly chaotic. For the past three weeks we've been playing baseball, lacrosse, finishing up dance, studying for finals, wrapping up with school events, all while enjoying the outdoors and family functions. Happily, we are winding down.

Ryan finished up with school a few weeks ago. He studied his brain to shreds before and during finals week. As parents Neil and I gave him the tools, time and support, but other than that, he was on his own. And in Ryan fashion, he quietly finished the year on top and we couldn't be prouder.

In our family's fashion, Em’s middle school graduation and the three girls dance recital fell on the same day, as well as a baseball playoff game for Zach. That day was a whirlwind of a day!

At the beginning of middle school Emily was a sweet little girl tediously trying her very best to figure out what was what. She ended her middle school career with the same sweetness but with the confidence and strength that we always knew she had, she just needed to find it. Em was honored with the Head Master Award. Her name is on a plaque outside the Head of School's office. After the ceremony, he told Emily that everyone of these students went on to do great things and that he knew that was her path as well. Em has a new sparkle in her eye--the sparkle is knowing that she is who she is and just because she has dyslexia doesn’t mean she can’t do great things! She has and will do great things.

Ryan and Em received awards from both of their schools for exceptional performance. Ryan was honored with an award in outstanding achievement in biology.

As for our little slugger Zach...he was chosen for his baseball league's all star team and named MVP of the game! Yay!

The recital was amazing! (Even though we had to change from graduation wear to recital wear in a D'Angelos Sandwiches bathroom! HA!) Emily, Lindsey, and Allyson were magnificent dancers.


It's been a whirlwind of a week! I think it's safe to say that we are looking forward to the lazy days of summer!

(As I re read this I realized it sounds like a complete bragfest...I decided to post it anyway.)

You are not going to believe this...

Holy smokes! I have a cell phone! Is it cell or cel?

I was most likely the only person on the planet over the age of 13 that did not have one. In fact, (some of you may have heard this story) last year Allyson and I were in the grocery store parking lot one morning when an elderly (I would say she was at least 80) women pulled her car in next to ours. I immediately noticed that she had a flat tire, and it didn’t look as if she had any idea. I figured I should let her know and see if I could help. As she unhurriedly opened her car door, I walked over to her and let her know, then I asked her she had Triple A. She did! I then said, “I don’t have a cell phone, but if we go to the service desk inside, I am sure they will allow you to use the store’s phone.” She then took out her cell phone and said she could call. So now I am in the cell phone club with Mildred the old lady with the flat tire as well as the rest of the population. Yay me.

Feel free to email me with your number...I have texting too. Wow, I wonder if Mildred can teach me how to do that?

Happy Birthday Allyson!

Where did those four years go? You are the exclamation point to our family! I love you so much sweet girl! I hope you enjoyed your cake for breakfast and the gifts that your brothers and sisters gave you! I know you liked your pack of gum! Yay you are four now and you can chew gum like a big kid!

Happy Happy Birthday!

Eeewww!!!

Neil was tenderly tucking Allyson into bed last night when he noticed her pillow pet was wet.

“Ally? Why is your unicorn wet, honey?” He asked.

“I was giving her a bath just now before you came up daddy,” she matter of factly revealed.

“How were you giving her a bath in your bed?” Neil wondered.

“I spit on her and rub it in so she is clean,” Allyson replied.


Gosh I love that girl, but eeewww!

Confessions of a Mom of a Teenager

My stomach is in knots as I write this.

I sent Ryan (9th grader) to school today knowing that he probably could have used a day off. He was a little under the weather yesterday, and even worse this morning. I sent him any way.

Ryan is a bright kid, always has been. And until this year, he was rarely challenged in school. It boggled my mind that he could earn all A’s with very little effort. It actually frustrated me. He is now attending his dream school and Neil and I couldn’t be happier with the culture there. It’s actually cool to be smart! As this year has progressed, the workload has become enormous, and the pressure to do well is insane. I am not helping.

For the first time in his academic career, Ryan failed a quiz. He said that most of the kids in the class had flunked and that the quiz was “ridiculous.” (The “other kids” phrase has never worked in our family and Ry knows that.) Neil and I kept our cool, but mentioned that it seemed as if he wasn’t devoting as much time to school work lately. This upset him, but I think he knew in his heart that we were right. He even did some extra credit in that class in an attempt to bring his grade up.

Fast forward to yesterday. He wasn’t feeling well and proclaimed jokingly, “I think I am going to take tomorrow off.” I replied that if he had a fever, he could. (He had an entire week off last week, including Monday for heavens sake!)

It turns out that he has another quiz today in the same class and on top of feeling yucky, he is clearly nervous. I decided to stay strong. He needs to push himself. He needs to learn what it is to really study and buckle down. This is what life is about…right? Right?

It’s hard to be strong. Did I mention that he was up until 1:00am studying? It’s hard to be strong.

Easter

Here is our annual "Easter Picture." We had a wonderful day! The weather was glorious and the kids didn't bicker at mass. Spending the day with Neil's family was fantastic too! Although Zach decided to declare that the chicken (it was turkey) was dry!! I almost died of embarrassment right there on the spot. Hopefully your Easter went well too.

Highlights

Here are some pictures from Emily's trip.





She had an absolutely AMAZING time! I couldn't be happier nor prouder of her!

Hmmmm?

Something is missing around here. Oh yeah, it’s Emily. She and her classmates (as well as two teachers) are in Nevada right now on a hiking trip. I couldn’t be happier for her, but she’s way over there! (I am pointing at Nevada on our map right now.) Tomorrow they are traveling to Utah to do some backpacking. Wow!

This class (ten of them) is brimming with excitement! They have trained for three years in anticipation of this trip! Em called when they arrived at the site and I could just hear her smile over the phone. (I know you really can’t hear a smile, but you know what I mean.) I miss her terribly and of course I can’t bring myself to truly think about her sleeping outside and rock climbing and doing all of these crazy adventurous things because it gives me a stomach ache. What I chose to think about is the joy in her heart. I can’t wait to hear all about it!

Scaredy Cat

Last Thursday Neil installed a new washer and dryer in our basement. Thank goodness because our dyer was taking an extremely long time to dry the clothing. (I know I know the Amish don‘t have clothing dryers.) In fact for one load it could take up to three hours to finish. That isn’t convenient when you have seven people in the house with places to go and people to see and you aren‘t comfortable leaving the house with the dryer on. The thing was also making a piercing screech with each turn that was most likely causing some hearing loss to the aforementioned seven people. Not only that, it was also ripping clothing to shreds! Poor Em was missing a strap on one of her camisoles, some of Allyson’s little socks looked more like tassels than socks, and last week I accidentally threw a bra in there and when I opened the dryer, only half of it was left. Huh? We definitely needed a new one.

The next day I began catching up on laundry in our new machine. I came back upstairs to check my emails as I listened to Allyson and her friend Kate happily coloring at the dining room table. I adore listening to the two girls chat. “Look Ally, a cat!” Kate proclaimed. We have this scary looking cat that roams the neighborhood. He is very large with what looks like a lions mane surrounding it‘s face. It also has the most evil eyes I have ever seen. When I encounter this cat (even through the window) I immediately get the chills…he is that creepy. It is a feral cat and once and a while he hangs out in the driveway next door and plays with the dead animals that he hunts. The kids are completely fascinated by it. When Kate repeated, “Look at the cat Ally!” I assumed that the scary cat was at it again. As I got up from my seat Kate sweetly calls, “Kellyyyy a caaaaat.” I step into the dining room and I completely freeze. My eyes are caught in the defiant stare of the cat that is INSIDE the house!

“Girls, you need to come with me,” I calmly take their hands and usher them to the stairs and close the door behind them. Meanwhile inside my head I am thinking, holy crap! How did this cat get in here and how do I get him out!!!!!!! “You girls stay upstairs,” I assure them, “and I will let you know when it’s okay to come down.”

Promptly, I shut all of the doors as the cat ran into the back hall. Shaking from head to toe I begin to pace around like a lunatic talking to myself as I attempt to figure out what to do next. On impulse, I call Neil. (I am fully aware that this was a wimpy thing to do, but I was petrified.) Neil agrees to come home to help (he is ten minutes away). I take a deep breath and decide to peek into the back hall. I cringe at the thought of approaching the ferocious feline, but I wanted to try and get him out by myself. (I guess I was embarrassed that I called Neil…I am such a girl!) Much to my relief, the basement door was open and he escaped down there. Quickly, I open the door to the outside and block the kitchen door with the trash barrel. I needed to physically witness the beast leave. Since I was fairly certain I could do this, I decided to call Neil back.

“Neil,” I whisper as to not startle the cat as it edged its way back up the stairs, “I think I am okay, you don’t have to come.” Neil replies, “Why are you whispering?” He must have conjured up an image of me trembling in a corner somewhere. As he is speaking to me the cat creeps even closer, his fur was standing straight up. He stopped at the very top and glared at me with those menacing eyes as if to say, Lady I will pounce on you and rip your face off if you take one more step. I stood my ground, trash barrel in one hand, phone in the other.

“Kelly! Kelly!” Neil calls through the phone.

I pause before murmuring, “He’s looking at me Neil I am scared, but I think…..” I whisper even softer, not wanting to startle the cat. Just then the beast makes a break for me, but I block him with the barrel and then he bolts outside!

“He’s out!” I shout. “I did it! Neil thanks for being there for me!”

I was still shaking when I went upstairs to tell the girls the coast was clear. They had forgotten all about the cat and had moved on to playing with the stuffed animals.

That nasty cat stuck with me for the remainder of the day. I later figured out that the cat must have snuck into the cellar when Neil was moving the new appliances in the day before. I felt lucky that he didn‘t jump out when the kids were down there, or when I was on the treadmill. Can you imagine?

Rugby!

Ryan (our ninth grader) was late calling me to come pick him up at the train station after school one day. He was trying out for the rugby team (despite my apprehension) so I figured practice was running a little late. Well, after sitting on my hands for twenty minutes, I called him…no answer. (I hate when that happens! My mind goes to places that I really don’t want it to go, but I immediately stop it.) Ten minutes later he finally calls me back, but unfortunately he doesn't sound right. In fact, he sounds upset. I ask him if he is okay, but instead of answering, he simply replies “Can I get a ride home from school today?” I knew something was terribly wrong because he loves taking the train. Neil picked him up since he was in the area on business. On the way home, Ryan confessed to Neil that he was hurt and having trouble breathing. When they arrived home, Neil proceeds to inform me that another teammate tackled Ry during a drill and struck him in the middle of his chest…hard. “I think my sternum is fractured mum,” Ryan winced. I immediately call the doctor. (Meanwhile I am thinking, why did I let him do this? I knew I shouldn't have agreed to this!) After x-rays the hospital wasn’t completely sure if he fractured his sternum since there was a separation, but it’s precisely where a growth plate is. So, Ryan may have fractured his sternum. Thank goodness he was instructed not to play any contact sports for at least six weeks.

"There is always next year!” Ryan proclaimed the next day. Oh Lord give me strength!

Fooling Around

Emily got a new camera and was taking some funny shots of the kids. I thought I would share.

Mommy Guilt

A friend of mine recently suggested that immediately after giving birth they secretly inject all new moms with a big dose of Mommy Guilt. I chuckled because I instantaneously visualized a colossal syringe being pierced into my arm as I (in a deep fog filled trance of relief) tenderly gazed into the beautiful eyes of my newborn baby, completely oblivious to any pain. If it were indeed true, that would explain the perplexing behaviors that moms (okay, me) sometimes exhibit.

After my shot of Mommy Guilt, the signs and symptoms immediately took effect. Nursing wasn’t going well and I felt like a complete failure. The nurses unknowingly scared me to death with conflicting advice, guidelines that made no sense to me and never ending pamphlets. Mix in well meaning friends and family, add a touch of raging hormones and sleep deprivation… it’s a wonder we made it through the first year alive.


I will never forget the first time I introduced our first son to our next door neighbor. Sweet Mrs. Z was a well meaning elderly woman with a big heart. She was thrilled to meet our new arrival! Peeking into the baby carriage she declared, “He is such a beautiful baby,” grinning from ear to ear I nodded as she continued, “You really need to watch him so nobody steals him, dear.” I can’t remember how I responded at that moment, but I recall being exceedingly suspicious of strangers for the next few days (okay years). I also wondered what she meant by “I need to watch him?” Was I not attentive enough? Am I neglecting my son? Does she think I am a bad mom? Luckily my very patient husband talked me through it and I finally let it go. Of course, my intense reaction was most likely due to the Mommy Guilt injection, right?

As the years went by, new worries surfaced and the guilt came along with it. Is the baby developing like they say in this book? Should I make my own baby food? Is this babysitter competent? Do I really need to wash this, or can I just spray it with Febreze? When was the last time I cleaned their ears? Is it safe to send him into the public restroom? How much TV is too much? Are my kids the only ones without a cell phone? Am I expecting too much from them? It’s dizzying!

Luckily, as time passes the side effects of Mommy Guilt subside a bit and you begin to realize that no parent is perfect. For example, when my first two children went to Bernazzani (they are in the eighth and ninth grade now) and forgot to pack their homework, I would frantically race to the school to drop it off immediately. Nowadays if one of the children forgets, I may bring it… at pick up time that is if I remember. Perhaps one of the side effects of the Mommy Guilt vaccination is memory loss? That would explain the occasional (okay often) forgotten permission slip, milk money, or over due media center books.

Children are blessed at birth with mothers overcome with such tremendous love that sometimes they just can’t help themselves. They want the very best for their precious off spring and when mistakes ultimately happen or unrealistic expectations erupt it can lead to insanity.

Adoptive parents (and of course dads) are no doubt filled with the same joyful madness. It’s the gift that keeps on giving. Thus when the perplexities of Mommy Guilt begin to get the best of me, I simply ask myself (just as I ask our five children if they feel inadequate), “Are you doing your very best? “ If the answer is yes, then there are absolutely no grounds for guilt…inoculation or not.

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Warnings: Do not watch the nightly news or crime themed programs on television for at least six weeks after injection.

Do not read more than one parenting book or magazine at a time for 12 months.

Pay no attention to well meaning comments regarding kidnappers, life insurance, and post partum weight loss.

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Side effects:

May cause an overwhelming awareness of how others see you as a parent

an inability to move away from the baby monitor

an intense urge to put your child in a bubble so no harm can come of them

L-E-N-T

L-E-N-T

Lets
Eliminate
Negative
Thinking

This is what the priest announced during his homily last Wednesday! Isn’t that ironic? This was exactly what our family decided to work on. God was speaking to us directly! Well, maybe not, but it sure felt like it. He gave us a “shout out!”

So far it’s been going fairly well here. It's hard for brothers and sisters to talk nicely to each other...especially during board games! Oy! Sibling squabbles during Disney Trivia Pursuit kind of squashes the fun. (Even Mikey Mouse looked annoyed!)

How is Lent going for you?

Lent

The season of Lent is coming and I am struggling with the decision on what I should abstain from during this notable time of the year. Alas, this happens every year. I look back at years past and it’s valuable, but I still grapple with this. One year I gave up television. Oh boy! I ended up taking a painting class at Home Depot with my good friend Erin and I sponge painted our entire house! HA! Giving up tv showed me how wasteful it is and it’s stuck with me to this day. Luckily I gave up on the sponge painting. Looking at the pictures cracks me up though! Another year (actually several) I gave up coffee. Let’s just say that my family lovingly begged me not to do this ever again! Last year I abstained from snacking between meals. At first it was a snap…I just had HUGE meals. A nice omelet with home fries for breakfast, two sandwiches and soup for lunch…LOL! I soon realized this was defeating the entire purpose and reverted back to eating regularly. No snacks was tough at first but it was extremely helpful. I had weaned Allyson from breast milk yet I was still eating as if I was a nursing mom. The no snacking one has stuck with me as well, but unfortunately at the moment, I have some health issues. I am currently dairy free, peanut free, corn free, and attempting to become gluten free! (This is really driving me batty, but I feel much better.) I am also rationed to one serving of red meat a week (I know!), so the food thing is just way too maddening right now!!! I guess I’ll let you know what I decide, and I cordially welcome (Okay I am begging you)any suggestions!

Snow

Hi There!

The kids are all home for the second day in a row due to never ending snow. I love snow days, and as most of you know, I adore having all of my "cubs in the cave," however, I have had enough of the white stuff! How many snowmen, igloos, snow cones, forts, lemon snow desserts, and snow slopes can one person make before they go insane?

That groundhog had better be right. “Spring! If you can hear me, please come quick, I am about to lose my mind!”

Does anyone have a picture of grass they would like to share with me? I forget what that green stuff (okay brown at our house) looks like.

Hmmm… I wonder what a beer flavored snow cone is like?

They're American?!

Allyson and I were at Wal Mart the other day picking up what I originally thought a few things. (I am sure some of you must know how that goes!) As I put more and more into the cart the more uneasy I became. Zach needed some materials for a zebra project, Ryan needed folders for school, I needed to make cupcakes for Lindsey’s party, not to mention all the odds and ends that you really don’t need but… so when Allyson asked to buy some florescent drinking straws I said, “Not today honey.” A few moments later as I was trying to find a number seven candle, Allyson once again gazed up at me with a package of straws in her hand. (This time they were red white and blue) and asked, “Can we buy these? Pleeeeeaase? They’re Americaaan?!” How could I say no to that?

Happy Birthday Lindsey!

Where has the time gone? My smile is brighter just thinking of you and your dazzling persona. I can’t imagine my day without your hugs and conversations. It simply wouldn’t be complete with out a glimpse of the adoring look in your eye as we snuggle for reading time, or watching you tend to Allyson during play, listening to your stories (I am amazed at how in tune you are with others.).
Overhearing you and Ryan discuss schoolwork, witnessing you and Emily practice dance moves, and even playing board games with Zach (minus the bickering!)are all wonderful gifts that you share with us. Thank you for being you!

Happy Seventh Birthday Lulu!

~I love you~

Sisters

I was going through the computer and found this picture that Emmy took on Christmas using her new camera. Nice job Em!

Jack and the Beanstuff

Saturday is dance day for Allyson and Lindsey! As we drove to class I noticed a large puffy cloud in the sky. I pointed it out and proceeded to throw out a storybook idea. The three of us created the main character and came up with a problem for him to solve. It was actually a pretty good story! In fact I proclaimed it out loud just as we pulled into the parking lot,"We created a wonderful story girls!" Allyson agreed, "Just like Jack and the Beanstuff!"

Gotta Lover Her!

Before bed this evening, (that sounds fancy doesn't it?). How about...

At nightfall, prior to retiring for the evening, Allyson and I were engaged in discussion.

Nah, let me tell it in my voice...

After story time and teeth brushing, Allyson and I were reviewing what we read about (bugs) and discussing our plans for tomorrow. As we wrapped it up (or concluded our conversation) I asked our sweet little three year old, "Today is Thursday Allyson, so what is tomorrow?" With a blink of an eye she replied, "Tomorrow."

2011!!!

Happy New year friends! I figured that if I put my resolutions in writing I could solicit your help and hopefully follow through with at least a few of these...



1. Be a better listener…lately my mind races or desperately attempts to hold on to a thought as the other person is talking to me when instead I should simply LISTEN. So what if I forget what I was going to say, that is something to work on next year, right?

2. Relax…the laundry can wait, but the kids are growing up so fast. I have fallen into a pattern of rushing to get everything (not just laundry) done so that I can relax with the kids later. Guess what? Later hasn’t been coming very often! There will always be something that needs attention. I prefer to pay attention to someone instead.

3. Delegate. That way I can be a better listener and relax more. (I am wicked smaaat huh!)

4. Stay on the workout schedule. It is so great for my mental health. At times I feel guilty taking the time, but I am a much nicer person after I work out.

5. Keep the spark lit! This one I will keep semi private, but it is so important to feel connected with Neil. During the hustle and bustle of the holidays (not to mention weeks of sick children!)we haven’t been as “close” as often as we usually are. The holidays are over baby! (How you doin’ Neil?)


There is another goal of mine. I need to write more. This was the whole reason that I began this blog in the first place. It brings me joy! So if you don’t see me blogging in a while, feel free to hound me.


God Bless and best wishes to you all!