Sunday, March 20, 2011
Fooling Around
Emily got a new camera and was taking some funny shots of the kids. I thought I would share.
Friday, March 18, 2011
Mommy Guilt
A friend of mine recently suggested that immediately after giving birth they secretly inject all new moms with a big dose of Mommy Guilt. I chuckled because I instantaneously visualized a colossal syringe being pierced into my arm as I (in a deep fog filled trance of relief) tenderly gazed into the beautiful eyes of my newborn baby, completely oblivious to any pain. If it were indeed true, that would explain the perplexing behaviors that moms (okay, me) sometimes exhibit.
After my shot of Mommy Guilt, the signs and symptoms immediately took effect. Nursing wasn’t going well and I felt like a complete failure. The nurses unknowingly scared me to death with conflicting advice, guidelines that made no sense to me and never ending pamphlets. Mix in well meaning friends and family, add a touch of raging hormones and sleep deprivation… it’s a wonder we made it through the first year alive.
I will never forget the first time I introduced our first son to our next door neighbor. Sweet Mrs. Z was a well meaning elderly woman with a big heart. She was thrilled to meet our new arrival! Peeking into the baby carriage she declared, “He is such a beautiful baby,” grinning from ear to ear I nodded as she continued, “You really need to watch him so nobody steals him, dear.” I can’t remember how I responded at that moment, but I recall being exceedingly suspicious of strangers for the next few days (okay years). I also wondered what she meant by “I need to watch him?” Was I not attentive enough? Am I neglecting my son? Does she think I am a bad mom? Luckily my very patient husband talked me through it and I finally let it go. Of course, my intense reaction was most likely due to the Mommy Guilt injection, right?
As the years went by, new worries surfaced and the guilt came along with it. Is the baby developing like they say in this book? Should I make my own baby food? Is this babysitter competent? Do I really need to wash this, or can I just spray it with Febreze? When was the last time I cleaned their ears? Is it safe to send him into the public restroom? How much TV is too much? Are my kids the only ones without a cell phone? Am I expecting too much from them? It’s dizzying!
Luckily, as time passes the side effects of Mommy Guilt subside a bit and you begin to realize that no parent is perfect. For example, when my first two children went to Bernazzani (they are in the eighth and ninth grade now) and forgot to pack their homework, I would frantically race to the school to drop it off immediately. Nowadays if one of the children forgets, I may bring it… at pick up time that is if I remember. Perhaps one of the side effects of the Mommy Guilt vaccination is memory loss? That would explain the occasional (okay often) forgotten permission slip, milk money, or over due media center books.
Children are blessed at birth with mothers overcome with such tremendous love that sometimes they just can’t help themselves. They want the very best for their precious off spring and when mistakes ultimately happen or unrealistic expectations erupt it can lead to insanity.
Adoptive parents (and of course dads) are no doubt filled with the same joyful madness. It’s the gift that keeps on giving. Thus when the perplexities of Mommy Guilt begin to get the best of me, I simply ask myself (just as I ask our five children if they feel inadequate), “Are you doing your very best? “ If the answer is yes, then there are absolutely no grounds for guilt…inoculation or not.
-------------------------------------------------------
Warnings: Do not watch the nightly news or crime themed programs on television for at least six weeks after injection.
Do not read more than one parenting book or magazine at a time for 12 months.
Pay no attention to well meaning comments regarding kidnappers, life insurance, and post partum weight loss.
---------------------------------------------------------
Side effects:
May cause an overwhelming awareness of how others see you as a parent
an inability to move away from the baby monitor
an intense urge to put your child in a bubble so no harm can come of them
After my shot of Mommy Guilt, the signs and symptoms immediately took effect. Nursing wasn’t going well and I felt like a complete failure. The nurses unknowingly scared me to death with conflicting advice, guidelines that made no sense to me and never ending pamphlets. Mix in well meaning friends and family, add a touch of raging hormones and sleep deprivation… it’s a wonder we made it through the first year alive.
I will never forget the first time I introduced our first son to our next door neighbor. Sweet Mrs. Z was a well meaning elderly woman with a big heart. She was thrilled to meet our new arrival! Peeking into the baby carriage she declared, “He is such a beautiful baby,” grinning from ear to ear I nodded as she continued, “You really need to watch him so nobody steals him, dear.” I can’t remember how I responded at that moment, but I recall being exceedingly suspicious of strangers for the next few days (okay years). I also wondered what she meant by “I need to watch him?” Was I not attentive enough? Am I neglecting my son? Does she think I am a bad mom? Luckily my very patient husband talked me through it and I finally let it go. Of course, my intense reaction was most likely due to the Mommy Guilt injection, right?
As the years went by, new worries surfaced and the guilt came along with it. Is the baby developing like they say in this book? Should I make my own baby food? Is this babysitter competent? Do I really need to wash this, or can I just spray it with Febreze? When was the last time I cleaned their ears? Is it safe to send him into the public restroom? How much TV is too much? Are my kids the only ones without a cell phone? Am I expecting too much from them? It’s dizzying!
Luckily, as time passes the side effects of Mommy Guilt subside a bit and you begin to realize that no parent is perfect. For example, when my first two children went to Bernazzani (they are in the eighth and ninth grade now) and forgot to pack their homework, I would frantically race to the school to drop it off immediately. Nowadays if one of the children forgets, I may bring it… at pick up time that is if I remember. Perhaps one of the side effects of the Mommy Guilt vaccination is memory loss? That would explain the occasional (okay often) forgotten permission slip, milk money, or over due media center books.
Children are blessed at birth with mothers overcome with such tremendous love that sometimes they just can’t help themselves. They want the very best for their precious off spring and when mistakes ultimately happen or unrealistic expectations erupt it can lead to insanity.
Adoptive parents (and of course dads) are no doubt filled with the same joyful madness. It’s the gift that keeps on giving. Thus when the perplexities of Mommy Guilt begin to get the best of me, I simply ask myself (just as I ask our five children if they feel inadequate), “Are you doing your very best? “ If the answer is yes, then there are absolutely no grounds for guilt…inoculation or not.
-------------------------------------------------------
Warnings: Do not watch the nightly news or crime themed programs on television for at least six weeks after injection.
Do not read more than one parenting book or magazine at a time for 12 months.
Pay no attention to well meaning comments regarding kidnappers, life insurance, and post partum weight loss.
---------------------------------------------------------
Side effects:
May cause an overwhelming awareness of how others see you as a parent
an inability to move away from the baby monitor
an intense urge to put your child in a bubble so no harm can come of them
Thursday, March 17, 2011
L-E-N-T
L-E-N-T
Lets
Eliminate
Negative
Thinking
This is what the priest announced during his homily last Wednesday! Isn’t that ironic? This was exactly what our family decided to work on. God was speaking to us directly! Well, maybe not, but it sure felt like it. He gave us a “shout out!”
So far it’s been going fairly well here. It's hard for brothers and sisters to talk nicely to each other...especially during board games! Oy! Sibling squabbles during Disney Trivia Pursuit kind of squashes the fun. (Even Mikey Mouse looked annoyed!)
How is Lent going for you?
Lets
Eliminate
Negative
Thinking
This is what the priest announced during his homily last Wednesday! Isn’t that ironic? This was exactly what our family decided to work on. God was speaking to us directly! Well, maybe not, but it sure felt like it. He gave us a “shout out!”
So far it’s been going fairly well here. It's hard for brothers and sisters to talk nicely to each other...especially during board games! Oy! Sibling squabbles during Disney Trivia Pursuit kind of squashes the fun. (Even Mikey Mouse looked annoyed!)
How is Lent going for you?
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